The Invitation Crisis: Why Good People Get Ghosted 👻
You have a life-changing product, a world-class opportunity, or a mission that could reshape someone's future. You know it in your bones. But when you try to share it, you're met with silence, skepticism, or the dreaded "I'll check it out later" that never comes. Why is inviting so difficult? Why do even the most enthusiastic prospects flake?
The problem isn't your passion; it's your process. Today, we're breaking down a legendary, time-tested framework so simple it can be written on a napkin. This isn't just about scripts; it's a profound shift in posture, psychology, and purpose. By mastering this 8-step invite process, you will not only see your show-up rates skyrocket, but you'll also attract higher-quality people who are drawn to your mission, not just your pitch.
The Macro Frame: Your Mission is Your Magnet 🧭
The core idea is this: You’re in this for life, and you're here to make a major, positive change in the world.
Before you even think about inviting, you must internalize this truth. People can sense desperation and transactional energy from a mile away. When you operate from a place of short-term commission-chasing, you repel the very leaders you want to attract. But when you speak on a “macro” mission level—about the change you are committed to creating for the rest of your life—you become a magnetic force. This framework is the tool, but your mission is the power source.
The 8-Step Napkin Invite Framework 📝
This is the tactical, step-by-step process. Each step is designed to build on the last, creating a seamless, professional, and incredibly effective invitation. Let's break it down.
Step 1: Be in a Hurry 🏃♂️
Meaning: Your invitation must be quick and respect both your time and theirs. Urgency communicates importance.
Goal: To set a professional tone that says, “This is brief, valuable, and I'm not here to waste your time.” This prevents the conversation from devolving into a long, rambling chat where the importance of your message gets diluted.
Think about it: busy, successful people don't have time for idle chit-chat. When you model this behavior, you subconsciously position yourself as their peer. The entire invite conversation should take 2-3 minutes, max. This is a surgical strike, not a long siege.
Sample Phone Openers:
- “Hey [Name], I was hoping I could catch you—you got a quick minute?”
- “Hey [Name], I’m super slammed right now but I was thinking of you and wanted to run something by you real quick. Got 60 seconds?”
Note on Texting/Messaging: If you're inviting via text, the same rules apply. Keep it short, high-energy, and packed with passion. Don't be afraid to use emojis to convey tone. Your emoji game better be strong! 💪🚀
Step 2: The Entry (Your Why) ❤️
Meaning: This is a quick, relatable bridge that connects what you're doing to why it matters on a human level.
The key here is authenticity. The company's mission is important, but your personal why matters more. This is where you earn the right to invite them without sounding like a salesperson. You share a sliver of your story and your passion.
Example Entry Content:
“So, the reason I'm calling is I recently started working with a financial company. But we're different—we focus on actually teaching people how money works, because literally nobody teaches this stuff in school. [Add personal why] For me, this is deeply personal. My family made just about every financial mistake you can imagine and ended up losing everything. I'm on a mission to make sure that doesn't happen to other good people. Honestly, I'll probably do this for the rest of my life.”
See how powerful that is? You've established the context, shared your passion, and demonstrated long-term commitment. Now, they're not just listening to a pitch; they're listening to a person on a mission.
Step 3: Choose Your Invite Type (The 3 Lanes) 🛣️
Not every prospect is the same. This framework gives you three distinct “lanes” to choose from based on your relationship with the person and their status. Choose one.
A) The Direct Invite
When to use it: When you're confident, you have a good relationship with the person, or you can be straightforward without it feeling weird.
Tone: “This is valuable, and it is worth your time.”
Example: “We’re doing a free 30-minute virtual Money 101 workshop that covers the basics. It’s been a game-changer for a lot of people. If I got you a link, would you take 30 minutes to check it out?”
B) The Indirect Invite (Warm Market)
When to use it: With people close to you (friends, family), when you're new and a bit nervous, or when you want to reduce pressure.
Psychology: You lead with a genuine compliment (which gives them a dopamine hit) and then ask for their opinion. This removes their skepticism because the focus isn't on them buying or joining; it's on them helping *you*.
Example: “Look, you’re one of the smartest, most switched-on people I know, and I really trust your opinion. I’ve started this new venture and I think it's got huge potential, but I’m new. Would you be willing to take a look at it for me and just tell me what you think?”
C) The Super Indirect Invite (High-Level Referral Source)
When to use it: When your target is highly successful, has a high status, or is someone you see as a potential hub of referrals rather than a direct recruit.
Psychology: This uses a powerful combination of humility and reverse psychology. You elevate them and position them as the expert.
Example: “Listen, I know how successful you are, and this probably isn’t for you—in fact, you should probably be teaching it. But in your line of work, do you ever run into people who are struggling financially simply because they don't understand how money works? [They say yes]. Those are exactly the people I’m on a mission to help. I’d love to be a resource you could refer people to, but obviously, you wouldn't do that unless you’d seen it for yourself. Would you be open to reviewing it to see if it’s something you’d be comfortable sending people to?”
Step 4: “If I could, would you?” (The Golden Question 🔑)
This is the single most important step in the entire process. Do not skip or change it.
This phrase is pure psychological genius. It establishes that your resource (the link, the seat, the information) has value. You're not just throwing it at them; you are offering a conditional trade. It frames you as a person of value and flips the script from begging to offering.
- It creates a “takeaway” frame.
- It gets a micro-commitment BEFORE you handle any logistics.
- It forces a clear yes or no, eliminating ambiguity.
Examples:
“If I could get you a link to that private overview, would you take 20 minutes to review it?”
“If I could get you a seat at our virtual event on Thursday, would you be able to join?”
Crucial Rule: Do NOT mention the date or time yet. First, get the commitment to the concept. Once they say “Yes,” you move to the next step.
Step 5: Confirm Date/Time 🗓️
Only after you get a “yes” to your “If I, would you?” question do you start scheduling. The best way to do this is with an alternative choice. Don't ask, “When are you free?” as it invites complexity and indecision. Give them two simple options.
Example: “Great! We’ve got one happening Wednesday at 7:30 PM and another on Thursday at 12:30 PM. Which of those would be better for you?”
Step 6: Double Confirmation (The Flake-Buster) 🤝
This small step dramatically increases show-up rates by adding a layer of social commitment. Once they've chosen a time, you lock it in with RSVP language.
Goal: To gently raise the stakes and make them feel the importance of their commitment.
Example: “Awesome, I'll go ahead and RSVP you for the Wednesday 7:30 slot and send you the link. You’re sure you've got that time blocked off and you're good to go, right?”
That final question makes them pause and mentally confirm their calendar. It communicates that this is a real event and their spot is being held.
Step 7: Hang Up / Move On 🤐
This is where so many people sabotage themselves. You've gotten the confirmation. The sale is made. Stop selling!
The moment you double-confirm, your job is done. Don't start rambling about products, compensation plans, or technical details. Oversharing at this stage only invites new questions and objections (“Can you just send me something I can read about it?”). Once the appointment is set, either end the call or gracefully change the subject.
Command: Once confirmed, get off the phone. Your work is done.
Step 8: The Fortune is in the Follow-Up 💰
Your work isn't over until they show up. A systematic follow-up process can literally double or triple your show-up rate. It shows professionalism and keeps the appointment top-of-mind.
A Simple Follow-Up Rhythm:
- Immediate: Send the calendar invite/link right after you hang up.
- Day-of Reminder: A simple text in the morning: “Hey! Looking forward to seeing you on the workshop tonight at 7:30! It’s going to be great.”
- 15-Minute-Before Confirmation: This is the game-changer. Send a text 15 minutes before the event: “Hey, we’re hopping on in 15 minutes! See you there!”
This final text reveals who is ready, who forgot, and who you need to reschedule immediately. If someone no-shows, don't get upset. Simply reach out and move them to the next session: “Hey, we missed you! No worries, things happen. We have another one on Thursday, can you make that one?”
The Career Loop: Find -> Invite -> Convert -> Repeat 🔄
This 8-step framework isn't a one-time trick. It's one part of a simple, repeatable loop that can build an empire over time. Your career boils down to this:
- 1. Find: Identify people you can help.
- 2. Invite: Use the Napkin Framework to professionally set the appointment.
- 3. Convert: Let your presentation or third-party tool do the heavy lifting.
That's it. Master this loop, and you master the business.
Final Thought: Do It With the Right Heart
Scripts and frameworks are powerful, but they are empty without genuine intent. When you truly believe in your mission to help people, your authenticity shines through every step. Lead with a servant's heart, use this professional process, and you won’t just build a business—you’ll build a legacy.